He knows no fear!

“Combat: Monkey on the Front Line” book – part 3

Monkey is working hard on his memoirs and once again we have been given an exclusive insight to his memoirs.

For the first time ever, we reveal the intense training of cuddly toys serving in the British Special Forces.

The Brecon Beacons where special forces selection is conducted.

Here is an exclusive extract from monkey memoirs revealing the tough training to get into the elite SAS regtiment.

“I arrive at the training depot in Hereford. There were eighty of us cuddly toys but we all knew that by the end of selection only five of us would be left. On our first day, our training Corporal taught us how to make a bed. Hospital corners at 45 degrees, top sheet folded back 12 inches and centre line mid-line down the bed – all neatly ironed. We were told that our first room inspection would be 0430 hours the next day. We had work to do for the inspection if we were to met the special forces high standards. I shared my bunk bed with a cuddly toy name “Georgie” and he was a cuddly Zebra. I took the top bunk and he took the lower one. We worked hard that afternoon preparing for the room inspection. When inspection came, I was nervous but I hid my emotions as the Corporal inspected my bed, it wasn’t to standard as I had mis-align the top sheet centre line. He shouted at me inches from my face. I felt his breath and salvia splattering over me as he shouted at me but I kept my stance and took it like a man. He then inspected Georgie bed. It wasn’t to standard as he had ironed his top sheet but had the iron on too hot and not enough steam and left a burnt mark on the sheet – he was booted from the selection cadre that same day. His bed making wasn’t up to special forces standard! He just packed his bags and left. The room inspections went on for twelve months with daily inspections but I had made it to the end and only five of us remained. The Colonel badged us as SAS. We celebrated in the NAFFI that night as we turned on the TV to watch the footie. It was then that we saw the news flash. Saddam Hussain had invaded Kuwait and we were going to war. A year of bed making and inspections had prepared me for war and I was ready.”

To be continued….

Monkey on SAS selection.

“Combat: Monkey on the Front Line” book is out this summer price £19.99

The webmaster team


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