He knows no fear!

Archive for April, 2013

Poll – Where’s Monkey?

Today was the deadline for the Where’s Monkey poll so now we will reveal the answer to the photograph.

Monkey is on the highest mountain of Britain but where is he?

Monkey is on the highest mountain of Britain but where is he?

We can now reveal the answer to our reader’s poll.

It wasn’t Mt. Everest or Mt. Sinai. It was in fact Ben Nevis in Scotland.

Read about our wee monkey adventures up Ben Nevis here:

https://britisharmysgtmonkey.wordpress.com/2012/03/09/my-climb-up-ben-nevis-in-scotland/

Congratulations to all of those with the correct answer. One of you successfully guessed the correct answer. Please contact our webmaster on our usual webmaster email to claim your prize which is a signed photograph of our wee monkey personally signed by our wee monkey. We will email the photograph to you.

This is the last of our “Where’s Monkey” competition for a wee while as we are starting a new competition tomorrow morning.

The new competition is “Where is this toilet in the world?”. As you all know, our wee monkey is a keen traveller and has been all over the world. Obviously, when nature calls our wee cuddly toy need to spend a penny and as such visited many toilets around the world. Some of them have been a charming experience and some of them had been horrible experiences. Our wee monkey has photograph some of these toilets of the world and tomorrow competition we will ask you to guess where is our feature toilet photograph. As with all of our competitions on this fantastic website, the prize will be amazing.

The “Where is this toilet in the world?” competition will be published at 8am tomorrow morning (UK time).

The webmaster team

Advertisements

Another monkey’s secret cockie recipe from Borneo

This afternoon, I decided to cook some more cockies for my lovely girlfriend ready for her packed lunch box tomorrow.

This secret cockie recipe was passed to me by my grandmother. I made my cockies using the secret cockie recipe that I had covered here:

https://britisharmysgtmonkey.wordpress.com/2012/10/03/monkeys-secret-cockie-recipe-from-borneo/

My girlfreind loves cockies in the work office and showing them to her girly work mates. Her work mates get so jealous of my cooking skills.

Cockies are delicious when hot from the oven.

Cockies are delicious when hot from the oven.

This afternoon, I felt like being a sculptor artist and I had decided to alter my cockie recipe to create a piece of art based upon a naked girl.

Me checking the ingredients that I need to make my piece of art.

Ingredients:

125g softened butter

100g light brown soft sugar

125g caster sugar

1 egg

225 g self-raising flour

1 tsp vanilla extract

Method:

1) Preheat the oven to 180°C (gas mark 4). Please get an supervising adult to help you.

2) Beat the egg lightly.

Beating the egg.

3) Cream butter and sugars, once creamed, combine in the egg and vanilla.

Stirring in the beaten egg with the buttered sugar.

4) Sift in the flour and mix together.

Sifting in the flour to the mix.

Mix the ingredients together to make the dough.

5) Roll out the dough and using a blunt knife, shaped off the naked girl body on to a baking tray.

Shape the dough into the shape of a beautiful naked girl.

Shape the dough into the shape of a beautiful naked girl.

6) Cook for 10 minutes until just golden round the edges.

7) Take out of the oven and leave to harden for a minute before transferring to a wire cooling rack.

My beautiful naked girl became a fat lady after baking.

My beautiful naked girl became a fat lady after baking.

8) Finally to decorate the fat lady body using baking decoration asscessories.

I enjoyed decorating my fat lady.

I enjoyed decorating my fat lady.

Enjoy your lovely fat lady delight.


My daytrip to Malmö, Sweden in 2013

Today I was going to cross the Øresund Bridge by train and into Sweden to the city of Malmö.

The Øresund Bridge links Denmark to Sweden and was opened in 2000. It is a dual railway/road bridge and is almost 5 miles in length with a 2.5 mile tunnel preceding the bridge from the Danish side. It only cost 78 DKK (approx. 9 Euros) to cross the bridge by train.

The journey time from Copenhagen to Malmö is approximately half an hour.

My day trip to Sweden was to visit the city of Malmö. This is the third largest city in Sweden and the most southernmost city in Sweden.

Me posing next to Malmö City Hall.

Me posing next to Malmö City Hall.

In recent years, Malmö has become known for it rape crime wave and has earnt the reputation of the rape capital of Europe. A sad reflection on the failings of modern politicians. Putting this aside, Malmö centre has a number of interesting historic buildings and a castle from a time when this part of Sweden was part of Denmark.

The Swedish flags outside the City Hall.

The Swedish flags outside the City Hall.

My visit to Malmö was to start in the city centre in the square.

The city centre had many historic buildings.

The city centre had many historic buildings.

Near the square is St Petri (The Church of Saint Peter). It is a Gothic style in which construction started in 1319. It has a 105 metre tall tower.

The Church of Saint Peter is a Gothic style church.

The Church of Saint Peter is a Gothic style church.

After seeing the church, I was off to Willys supermarket to get my sandwiches. I like Willys.

Willys was very tasty food.

Willys was very tasty food.

Malmö is the host for the 2013 Eurovision Song Contest. This is the yearly contest to find Europe’s worst song and then promote the song in as a song of European unity. The contest is a mismatch of awful singers who had past their time many years ago (or in some cases decades ago).

Malmö is the host for 2013 Eurovision Song Contest.

Malmö is the host for 2013 Eurovision Song Contest.

I was walking around the historic centre of Malmö.

The old buildings of Malmö.

The old buildings of Malmö.

Near the centre of Malmö is the castle.

Malmö Castle is a fortress located in Malmö built in the 1530s.

Malmö Castle is a fortress located in Malmö built in the 1530s.

The castle is now a museum.

This castle replaced the older castle of 1434 by King Eric of Pomerania.

This castle replaced the older castle of 1434 by King Eric of Pomerania.

The castle is near the city park.

This charming windmill is in the park near the castle.

This charming windmill is in the park near the castle.

It was getting late on the afternoon. I was wearing my newly knitted daisy wooly hat.

Me posing next to the windmill.

Me posing next to the windmill.

I was off to the harbour for the sunset.

A Viking boat in the harbour.

A Viking boat in the harbour.

The harbour is a major port for Scandinavian shipping.

The sunset over the lighthouse.

The sunset over the lighthouse.

After visiting the harbour, I watched the sunset over the harbour with the Turning Torso tower in the background. The Turning Torso is the tallest skyscraper in Sweden.

The sunset over the harbour with the Turning Torso in the background.

The sunset over the harbour with the Turning Torso in the background.

For more information about Malmö please visit:

http://www.malmo.se/english


My trip to Copenhagen, Denmark in 2013 – part 2

On my second day in Copenhagen, I was going to see the sights of the city paying attention to the architecture of the buildings. My walk around Copenhagen started at the fort of Kastellet near the waterfront. The fort is close to the Little Mermaid. The fort is one of the best preserved star fortresses in Northern Europe. It is constructed in the form of a pentagram with bastions at its corners.

The fort is still as an active military area that belongs to the Danish Defence Ministry, however members of the public can walk around the fort grounds. It is a popular site for joggers.

At the southwest corner of the fort is a rather charming windmill.

The windmill was built in 1847.

The windmill was built in 1847.

Near the entrance of Kastellet is a rather charming St. Alban’s Church surrounded by a frozen lake.

The sky was clear and the lake was frozen.

The sky was clear and the lake was frozen.

I ate my sandwiches here.

Monkey at St. Alban's church in Copenhagen.

Monkey at St. Alban’s church in Copenhagen.

After having my sandwiches, I farted alot and then went to the waterfront.

The marina was frozen and icy.

The marina was frozen and icy.

Heading towards the City Hall, I walked down the Strøget which is the longest pedestrian shopping area in Europe.

The Strøget was a charming walk.

The Strøget was a charming walk.

The round tower (Rundetårn) was a 17th-century tower built as an astronomical observatory.

The round tower (Rundetårn) is 36 metres tall.

The round tower (Rundetårn) is 36 metres tall.

The tower does not have stairs instead a 7.5 turn spiral ramp forms the only access to the towertop observatory.

The spiral corridor has a length of 210 m, climbing 3.74 m per turn.

The spiral corridor has a length of 210 m, climbing 3.74 m per turn.

Every year in spring, a unicycle race is held and the contestants have to go up and down the tower. The record is 1 minute and 48.7 seconds.

The tower still had it orginal toilets!

I was not impressed by the toilets here.

I was not impressed by the toilets here.

I think the toilet tips out onto the street below.

The toilet was stinky!

The toilet was stinky!

The view from the top is great.

The view from the top of the tower.

The view from the top of the tower.

Continuing my walk, I came across great architecture.

The buildings were colourful.

The buildings were colourful.

The west end of Strøget at The City Hall Square is a short walking distance from Tivoli Gardens and Copenhagen’s Central Train Station.

I decided to walk over to the artificial island of Christianshavn.

Christianshavns Kanal separates Christianshavn in a city side and a rampart side part.

Christianshavns Kanal separates Christianshavn in a city side and a rampart side part.

Christiania is a self-governing neighborhood which has established semi-legal status as an independent community as a “city within the city”. Photography is against the rules here as too many drug dealers deal their junk here.

Christiania is known as the freetown.

Christiania is known as the freetown.

Near Christiania is the The Church of Our Saviour and it is famous for it corkscrew spire.

The church with it corkscrew spire.

The church with it corkscrew spire.

After visiting the island of Christianshavn, my wee cotton feet was sore, so I headed back to the hotel.

On my way back to the hotel, I saw a statue of a man urinating against the wall.

This statue was peeing against the wall.

This statue was peeing against the wall.

Tomorrow, I was going to cross the Øresund Bridge by train and visit Sweden for the day.

To be continued….

For more information about Copenhagen please visit:

www.visitcopenhagen.com


My trip to Copenhagen, Denmark in 2013 – part 1

I spent last week in Copenhagen in Denmark. It was cold and icy but the skies were clear and I managed to take great photographs.

On my first day I was going to go to the new harbour (Nyhavn) for an early morning cuppa then off to the palace to see the changing of the guards, and then finally to see the wee famous Little Mermaid.

Nyhavn has many bars and cafes.

Nyhavn has many bars and cafes.

The new harbour is known as Nyhavn and is a 17th century waterfront with many cafes and bars. Stretching from Kongens Nytorv to the harbour front just south of the Royal Playhouse, it is lined by brightly coloured 17th and early 18th century townhouses.

I was glad it was sunny skies here.

I was glad it was sunny skies here.

The harbour has many old historical wooden ships adding to the charms of the waterfront.

The waterfront has charm to it.

The waterfront has charm to it.

Near Nyhavn is Amalienborg Palace and it is the winter home of the Danish Royal family.

It consists of four identical palace façades around an octagonal courtyard. In the centre of the square is a monumental equestrian statue of Amalienborg’s founder, King Frederick V.

Amalienborg Palace was originally built for four noble families. But in 1794, Christiansborg Palace burnt down and the royal family moved in.

At midday each day, the changing of the guards takes place at the Palace. As a training sergeant, I was eager to inspect the guards and see how they match to the British.

The guards was eager to stare each other out!

The guards was eager to stare each other out!

Eventually two of the guards were out witted by the excessive staring and marched off!

Eventually two of the guards were out witted by the excessive staring and marched off!

The Captain of the Guards asked me personally to be the inspecting cuddly toy. I was honoured to be of service to Danish royality.

I was inspecting the Guards.

I was inspecting the Guards.

I was able to get up close to the Guards for these great photographs. I picked them up for fluff on uniform and not highly polish boots but with my sharp drill voice I got them up to standard.

These Guards were very well turned out.

These Guards were very well turned out.

After seeing the Palace Guards, the Queen of Denmark then invited me inside the Palace for tea and scones.

I then went back to the waterfront to see the famous Little Mermaid statue.

This statue has become an iconic landmark of Copenhagen.

This statue has become an iconic landmark of Copenhagen.

The statue is based on a fairy tale by Hans Christian Andersen.

This statue is on the waterfront of Copenhagen.

This statue is on the waterfront of Copenhagen.

The statue has been a tourist attraction since it was unveiled in 1913.

To be continued….

For more information about Copenhagen please visit:

www.visitcopenhagen.com