He knows no fear!

Archive for July, 2015

Sgt Monkey retirement

It is with sad news to announce that Sgt Monkey has retired from the British Army.

Our wee cuddly toy has served the Queen and country for over twenty years and has earnt a chestful of medals.

The simple truth is that our wee monkey can no longer climb over the 12 ft wall on the obstacle course.

Monkey in his uniform.

Monkey in his uniform.

From now on, we will call our wee cuddly toy monkey Mr Monkey. We will still call this website the Sgt Monkey website as it is too complicated to change the name of our website.

We ask all of our monkey fans to address monkey as Mr Monkey from now on when sending him an email or when putting a comment on to the blog.

Our wee cuddly toy has decided to go into the porn industry as a filmmaker. Our next door neighbours has agreed to help him as the cast for his first movie to be titled “What goes on upstairs?”

The movie is expected to be release on YouTube this coming winter.

We wish our wee cuddly toy all the best in his new chosen career.

– The webmaster team –


50000 hits celebration!

The OFFICAL Sgt. Monkey website is please to announce that at 1943 hours on Monday 13th July 2015, we had recieved our 50000th hit.

Stories of our wee monkey adventures and gossip is bringing in new bloggers each day.

Obviously the recent adventures of our cuddly toy whilst in Turkey attracted new bloggers to this website.

Our wee cuddly toy was getting p***ed tonight to celebration this fantastic news.

Getting drunk....

Getting drunk…

To celebrate this milestone we at the webmaster offices are giving away a free monkey poo sample of shampoo to a lucky monkey fan. The lucky winner will be able wash his or her hair using this specially made bottle of shampoo that our wee monkey has poop into, this gives that extra shine to your hair and that authentic smell of the jungle fragrance.

To win this prize all you have to do is to email our webmaster offices on our usual email a 250 word statement stating why you love our website. The winner will be notified via email and told to collect their prize at a Argos shop and collect point.

Competition closing date 5pm Friday 17th July 2015.

Good luck with your entries.

We will of course keep you all up to date of Sgt. Monkey gossip and adventures.

The webmaster team